Bank clerk Cora and retired fireman Clive adopted their daughter when she was four. They live in St Helens and love going on lots of caravan holidays together during the school holidays.
Cora says: “Ember joining us made us a family and she loves saying that we’re the three minions!”
Cora was in her late forties and Clive was in his mid-fifties when they adopted Ember. Clive has two grown-up children from his first marriage. They want to dispel the myth that there’s an upper age limit when it comes to adopting. Clive stresses: “If you want to become parents and are in good health, don’t hesitate to get in touch with Together for Adoption. Age is just a number!”
Ember loves her forever mummy and daddy so much. She says: “Mummy is funny, and Daddy knows LOADS about EVERYTHING.”
Learning is key
Both Cora and Clive have benefited from the courses available to them pre- and post-adoption and reading up on trauma. Cora says: “Our advice to people on their adoption journey is to be both pragmatic and positive. Research and look at case studies. Get support.
“We have learnt how important reacting to our child’s challenging behaviour and meltdowns using PACE parenting is and how this should always be adhered to. Our daughter has changed from 99% angry to 5% age-typical childhood outbursts in the last three years!”
Small compliments make a big difference
All parents want to be their children’s biggest supporters and make them feel like anything is possible. Lots of adopted children struggle with low self-esteem and this is something that Cora and Clive have worked on with Ember.
Clive explains how they do this: “We keep repeating that she is a very good girl, such great company, and we work on trying to build slowly her attachment and self-esteem.”
Ember also has grandparents, aunties, uncles and cousins who love her and support her. Cora adds: “They have been extremely on board with understanding trauma and its long-lasting effects, one set of grandparents even attending classes to further their understanding.”
To start your journey today, complete our online enquiry form or call our friendly team for more information on 01942 487272.
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*Anonymous Adopter – Names and LA changed for confidentiality*